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Wall St. Reform? Gordon Gekko Offers Obama a Deal
“MR. PRESIDENT, WE’LLÂ SUPPORT YOURÂ PLAN FOR A PUBLIC OPTION, AS LONG AS WE CAN SECURITIZE IT, DERIVATIVIZE Â IT, AND TRADE IT ASÂ OPTIONS … AND THENÂ SELLÂ WHAT’S LEFTÂ AS ‘SUB-PRIME HEALTH...
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A Real War on Xmas: Outrage Grows Over Excessive Bonuses to Santa’s Elves
In a sign of the substantial divide between Main Street and North Pole Street, a growing chorus of criticism is being directed at the over-sized bonuses doled out this year to the under-sized elves of...
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Sign of the Times: NYC’s Stuyvesant Town Returned to Native-Americans
In perhaps the ultimate sign that the burst of the real estate bubble has reached âhistoricâ proportions, Tishman Speyer Properties and BlackRock Realty, the financially troubled owners of New...
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Satirical Political Wins a Contest!
No, you Seinfeld fanatics — not that kind of “contest!” I’m talking about the highly prestigious, dynamite, Nobel-like 1st Place prize in this year’s HumorFeed contest for Best Satire of the Year....
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Forget ‘Abacus 2007-AC1′, Goldman Sachs Peddled Actual Abacuses
“WE SIMPLY TOLD OUR INVESTORS THAT ABACUSES WOULD NEVER GO BUST, SINCE THEY WOULD BEST TRACK THE SLIDE THE REST OF OUR INVESTMENT PRODUCTS CAUSED THE ECONOMY.”...
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Remake of ‘The Graduate’ to Feature Goldman Sachs
Mr. McGuire: I just want to say one word to you – actually, it’s four words. Ben: Yes sir. Mr. McGuire: Are you listening? Ben: Yes I am. Mr. McGuire: âSynthetic Collateralized Debt Obligations.â...
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GOP Claims Financial Reform Will Create ‘Meth Panels’
“WE KNOW THAT AFTER WALL STREET USES THE BAILOUT MONEY FOR DRUGS, THEY’LL JUST CUT IT INTO LITTLE PIECES AND SNORT-SELL IT TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER.”
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Goldman Sachs Boasts: We’re No. 1 When It Comes to ‘No. 2′
“WHEN IT COMES TO CREATING CDOs — COLLATERALIZED DOODY OBLIGATIONS — WE’VE REALLY GOT AWESOME POWERS.”
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Goldman Sachs Confesses: Next to GOP, We Come Up ‘Short’
“WE’VE SOLD OUR CLIENTS A LOT OF SHIT OVER THE YEARS, BUT TO SEE THE GOP BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF US IN HEARINGS, AND THEN BET AGAINST FINANCIAL REFORM ON THE SENATE FLOOR … WELL, THAT’SÂ Â NOT SYNTHETIC,...
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Forget the Housing Bubble, Goldman Sachs Shorted ‘The Bubble Boy’
“WE SOLD A PRODUCT CALLED ‘OXYGEN-1′ … THAT ACTUALLY HAD NO OXYGEN.”
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